Sweden and the exciting conclusion 5/7/2010

So tonight i'm leaving to come home for good. I can't say that i'm going to really miss Torino, but last night i had a tinge of pain pass over me as i realized i wouldn't be traveling anymore.
So the last trip that i went on was to Gothenburg City in Sweden. The city itself wasn't terribly impressive because it is a port town and very industrial. The people were so stereotypical though and we loved it. Everyone was blond and at least six feet tall. We found out that one of the days that we were in the city there was a massive labor parade taking place. So... we set out to go find some swedish people to socialize with at the parade.

At the parade we met a couple groups of people and one directed us to the greatest Swedish meatball restaurant in existence. I know that i talk about food a lot in my posts, and this one won't be any different. Well it was one of those meals that panics you because your so afraid that it will end before your full . I shamelessly vacuumed up the food in front of me like a bulimic elephant alone in a room with a mound of peanuts. Needless to say I think you know what happened next. I wiped my face clean and headed for a celebratory bonfire that the swedes were having that night.

At the bonfire, we met this really interesting group of people. We started talking, and they asked if we wanted to hang out in there apartment. So of course we went with our safest option and said "okey dokey" and followed these people through the woods to their apartment. When we got there we talked for a while and everything was going great (Except for the fact that they were all a foot taller than us) UNTIL the girl who owned the apartment came over to me and insisted that if John and I wanted to stay we had to pick a dance from her "Big book of American dance moves" and perform it. I told her no, of course, and we started to argue until she told us to leave. We of course did the intelligent thing, and stayed. I sat in my chair listening to that girl go on and on about dance moves, verbally raping my eardrums until i couldn't take in anymore. I looked over at John who was engaged in what seemed to be a one sided conversation about women's rights, and i realized it was probably time for us to leave. We said our goodbyes and left.

In the park we walked through to get home we came across a free zoo which was fun. Seals, Moose, the works.

Anyway, that is the exciting conclusion to my adventures in Europe. Can't wait to see you all.

Bruges 4/27/10

We went to Bruges this last weekend, and it was as amazing as i remembered. Everything is so clean compared to Torino, but the prices of everything are over the top. Our first day there, John and I went to an all you can eat rib place called "De Hobbit". It was themed after Lord of the Rings, and the menu was a newspaper called, the daily hobbit. We stayed in a eight bed hostel and we met so many people. The second night we met up with these french guys and tried to labor through hours of conversation. Really tough. They were nice, but the language barrier was so severe. The next day we went to a chocolate museum and a french fry museum. Both were fun, but i'd say the fry museum was the best. All i really wanted was to eat french fries and chocolate, but they felt they had to give you a huge history on everything. Also the chocolate museum had a giant Barack Obama carved out of chocolate. Very offensive. The girls and boys go crazy for Barry over here, i dont get it. I guess they all want hope and change. We went to the outskirts of the city and saw some decomissioned windmills. Apparently, in Belgium Rock and Roll is just catching on, and by rock and roll i mean eighties glamor rock. We went to this bar in brussels where there was a gun's and roses cover band and in bruges we saw a white snake cover band. Then one of the bands played an original which killed the mood and everyone dispersed. This has to be a short blog because im recovering from an illness and need to sleep.

Florence

So it has been a while since my last post because i have been extremely busy. School work has picked up and James is still living in our apartment because his flight was cancelled do to the Volcano and junk. I am however writing this email from my favorite place in all of Europe-Bruges. Florence was really spectacular and even more fun because James was there. I saw Michelangelo's David, the wooden Mary Magdalen, and I climbed to the top of the duomo.
I even took a picture of Michelangelo's David statue despite the screams of numerous employees foaming out the mouth trying to maintain their monopoly on post cards. People say that air traffic controllers have stressful jobs, but i think that being a "junk yard dog" for Michelangelo's David would be worse. You flounder around the room screaming "No Pictures, no pictures" like a superstitious Navajo Indian for about 8 hours a day. It seems like a combination of cruel and unusual punishment with a hint of situational comedy thrown into the mix. The only way to describe the personal hell that is this security guards life would be to imagine a person in a wheel chair finding himself in a very narrow handicap stall whose door only opens in.
Anyway i got a picture and as blurred as it was---- It was still a picture
The next day James took us to his favorite restauraunt where we were flooded with an impressive number of employees who all seemed to know James on a very personal level. It couldn't help but draw attention to the fact that John and I will be leaving behind very few friendships in Torino. The Kebab people, a teacher or two, and maybe the homeless woman outside the Grocery Store i pretend not to notice everyday.
The next day we climbed to the top of the Duomo which, suprisingly enough, is covered with a horribly barbaric mural. It appeared to be a massive depiction of the heinous torture involved with going to hell. As i gazed at the graphic artwork i couldn't help but think- After all the bible classes i've taken this really isn't what my interpretation of hell is like, at all. JUST THEN as i was thinking that, i saw it, my own personal hell captured in art form. It was rather hidden and it took me near 15 minutes of surveillance to find, but it embodied everything that i fear and loathe in this world. It was what appeared to be a frog person standing on two legs like a Neanderthal beating a skinless man un-mercilessly with a sock full of batteries. Pretty diabolical, and yet it definitely put the fear of God in me.
We did a lot of fun things while we were in Florence, one thing i'm not proud of is my decision to eat a double decker waffel and nutella sandwich. The story is as follows:
The day was like any other day, a little colder maybe, but that was the charm of the morning hours in the shade of the duomo. The cafe was small, quaint one might say, and exceedingly close to our place of stay.Thats where the mistake happened.
--- To eat a double decker waffle and nutella sandwich you have to have 3 things
1. No pride
2. No friends
3. No fear of kidney damage
"I'm good on two out of three of those" i thought as i strolled in with my two friends. Fast forward to the end of the meal- at this point i had diagnosed myself with type two diabetes, and "Finding a nice dialysis machine" had catapulted its way to the top of my priority lists. I left the cafe a broken man.
I realize that the format of my writing is very similar to that of Matt Drudge and therefore near impossible to understand. I apologize for that. I also apologize for my unnecessarily graphic depictions of my poor eating habits the last two blogs. That being said i can continue with my depiction of Florence.
The streets were crowded, but for good reason because the weather was spectacular and so was the city. One more eventful thing happened while i was in italy, Italians never stand in line, they don't understand the concept of a line which, of course, can be incredibly frustrating to you if you have been standing patiently in line while herds of lemmings speaking gibberish flow past you on either side. So late Saturday evening i finally snapped. You think ?Snapped?, but John your a piece maker- you defuse situations- too that i would say, i agree. This guy, however, pushed me too far, and so i decided to put this Jack back in his box. I pushed my way over to him and told him he better move back to the end of the line unless he wants to "make something of it". Which in case you don't know could mean anything, but i think the general implication is fighting. We both stood and looked at each other until he finally said, "You Americans always have to have your lines." He may have dissed America in that moment, but i had gotten him to back down and so i feel like once again its America 1 and Italy 0. Don't worry Mom i'm coming home soon. haha
Love you all
John

And the picture of me on the broom stick, is in a cemetery

April 10, 2010 Ibiza

So i have been in Ibiza for an unholy amount of time, and i can't say that i was at all pleased to come home to my "saving grace" Torino. Ibiza was filled with a lot of memories, but i think most notable one involved John and I meeting up with these two marines. We didn't know them before we go there- we just kinda met up with them. Anyway as fate would have it, only weeks before our own arrival to Ibiza a yacht had run aground right on the edge of the most popular beach in all of Ibiza. Unfortunately, the yacht was under the category of what the Spaniards like to call "dirty money" so needless to say they just left it there. Anyway that night we climbed aboard and were just messing around-It was all fun and games-until from the depths of the behemoth we caught a glimpse of what was below deck. We had only moments before descended below deck with nothing but a flip phone to guide us when we were struck by the sight of a small army of homeless people laying side by side in the base of the yacht. Excuse my insensitivity, but it looked like something from a holocaust video, because when the light hit them what looked like a pile of corpses started to move. We quickly left the boat, but we were freaked out. More importantly though the two marines were freaked out.

We spent most of our time in Ibiza just meeting people and talking. The beaches there were spectacular, John and I had arrived about 3 weeks too early for the "season" so there was rarely anyone on the beach with us. Our original plan was to island hop around ibiza to islands named "Palma del mellorca" and "Menorca" but we found out that the 30 minute ferry ride was going to cost us 60 euro one way so we canceled all of our hostel reservations and stayed in Ibiza. The food there was incredible and i even found mountain dew in one grocery store. Of course the backwards spanish don't use artificial sugar, so what i thought was moutain dew was more like citrus flavored kool aide sweetened with a small twig of sugar cane. I reached all new levels of despair when i took that first sip. I contemplated cutting my wrists, but i decided against the idea. The jury might still be out on that one.

Every day that we were in Ibiza we ate at the same restaurant. I couldn't tell you the name because i think that the spanish in all there eloquence might have simply called it "bar/restaurant". I'm not one to venture into new avenues of taste, but i decided to try the "lomo y queso" or "lamb and cheese" against my better judgement. One bite into this sandwich and you would have thought that this was a double decker "manna and quail" sandwich with cheese. I was so pleased by the sandwich i returned the following day, and the next, and the next. What i neglected to realize however is that your body becomes accustomed to things that you eat, and i threw it a curve ball when, after 7 years of no lamb, the dam was broken and i barraged my insides with lamb after lamb after lamb sandwich. I imagine my stomach spent hours sifting through the nutritionless lamb distraught and panicked to find something of value. People say that there is no reason for the appendix, but i know that after this last week your stomach probably uses that to stick lamb into when your body is over run by the stuff. Did i throw up at one point, yeah. Was it because of the lamb, probably. Did i go back the next day and get a lomo y queso, Yeah. Did i feel sick the next day, definitely.

Life goes on. Torino is a cruel mistress, and to return to her is to kiss the devil with open eyes. I'm exaggerating, its not that bad, but this next weekend i'm going to Florence to see James and then only one more trip before i come home. I miss you all.

I am the highway

So its been such a long time since my last blog post so i'll make this one extra long to make up for that. As you know, Jamie came to see me and we went to cinque terre, which is spectacular. We stayed in the last town (Riomaggiore) and brilliant me went the wrong direction until we ran into a couple of Russians who said we were nowhere near any town. The views were spectacular, and the walk from Corniglia to Vernazza was my favorite. We ate in this little restauraunt on the water and then we got some gelato. It was really everything you could ask for from Italy. We stayed there about three days and then we headed back to Torino. We took a quick the train the next day and saw the Duomo in Milan and then we grabbed some McDonalds and headed back to the human roach motel. The next week was littered with great times, Jamy had an opportunity to spend time with my friends and I, and they all really liked her. I took Jamy to my favorite restauraunts and we had a lot of fun. One of the kids who worked in the Kebob shop had an obvious crush on her, and so i had Jamy say a couple things in Italian. (Really made his day).

Ok so in non-jamy related news. Today i had a gigantic presentation that counted for 30% of my grade in a class. I had to do a report on peddlers so i put together a very professional paper and then a slideshow. The slide show was ridiculous, but i think my teacher really liked it. (I attached the slideshow below)

I think that i will reel in a high A+ after the extra effort i put into that slideshow.

After my project, i went to the grocery store and bought head phones and a couple of other things. The woman at the register forgot to ring up the headphones and as i was walking out i said off the detector. The security guard pushed me into the back room patted me down and started accusing me of being a thief. He was really starting to annoy me because he kept pushing me and yelling, so i kinda just walked away and got the woman who rung me up and had her explain to him her mistake. She did and my name was cleared, but it still was a huge time drain and pretty irritating. No one has ever accused an Italian of being overly intelligent.

Life goes on and i will try to post more, more frequently now that the barrage of visitors has ended.

March 1, 2010

This weekend we were supposed to go to Barcelona, but after a two hour train ride, a 40 minute bus ride, and 3 hours waiting in the airport they canceled our flight without any warning. I argued with the Ryan Air people just to have them tell me to sleep in the air port for 10 hours. So John and I returned to Torino at 2:30 and went to bed disappointed. I believe i got my money back for the ticket, but i still had to pay a penalty for not showing up at my hostel and i had to pay for the transportation to and from the airport. We were disappointed, but we made the best of the weekend. We went to an Italian party this weekend because we heard a lot of noise in the apartment above us and we went to check it out and ended up stumbling on an Italian party. I ended up talking in broken Italian for a while and in English to this random Chinese guy and his girlfriend. After that, we went down to a restaurant in this sweet part of town, but as we were walking down the main strip i saw my roommate (Not John) standing in the middle of the road with blood all around him. He was missing his two front teeth and he had been hit by some other kid in the program. After helping him find his teeth, he left for the hospital and i continued on my merry way. Yesterday, we went and watched the Canadian/American hockey game and cried a little afterward. We went to this Bar that had an American and a Canadian room and i was so loud that i embarrassed myself. I hurt my hand from banging it on the stove so that was a bit of a downer as well. Peace be with you all

February 23, 2010

We didn't go anywhere this weekend instead we stayed in Torino and relaxed. We play this game, "Antagonize the gypsy" where we do everything in our power to waste the time of a random gypsy. Gypsies specialize in disrupting dinners and turning stomaches. They primarily have emmigrated from India and Bangledesh. This weekend i was able to keep one long enough to recite my entire oral composition to him. This weekend wasn't terribly eventful, but we found ways to occupy our times. My final for elementary Italian is on Thursday and im leaving for barcelona that night. I will keep you all updated on what goes on this coming weekend. Looking forward to returning to my old stomping grounds.

Sorry about your car dad